Now this is the second time I have written this post. I spent about two hours slaving over it yesterday only to have Blogger crash on me. Thank heavens the kids were in bed as my language was not fit for young ears, let me tell you. There is nothing more demoralising (ok so there probably is but right now with chaos reigning all around me, an 8 year old playing stacking cups - the noise of which is akin to Chinese water torture if you haven't been party to the din - a 6 and a 4 year old trying to clearly kill each other in the playroom, tea to make, swimming bags and stacks of shopping to empty - I'm struggling to think of it) than having to rewrite a blog that took you ages to write. So here is the second version. Which will be shorter and nowhere near as hilariously witty as the previous one was. Obviously - I sweated blood and tears over it.
So moving swiftly on to the matter in hand. The Boyfriend Jean. Interjection here and pretentious fashion lingo alert. The Boyfriend Jean, the skinny jean, the bootcut jean - but a pair of boyfriend jeans, a pair of skinny jeans and a pair of bootcut jeans. It makes sense somehow. Somewhere pretentious. I however, just have delusions of grandeur and am merrily using the lingo in an attempt to fit in. Justification over.
With regards to The Boyfriend Jean, I fear that it would be easier to solve world hunger than it is to find the perfect pair. A veritable minefield for the lady of a certain age. The classic item of clothing that epitomises the struggle between mutton and frump. And here is why.
- Wash. This is lingo (I'm on a roll) for colour. Personally I am looking for my boyfriend jeans to look lived in (ideally by David Gandy) and therefore need to have a faded tone to them. And be slightly distressed. But not too distressed. Back up the TOWIE truck - not perhaps the look that I think most of us are after. Not too bleached and certainly not too holey. The flesh on my upper thigh does not to be exposed to the masses. Especially at this time of year. Ideally never.
- Slouch. To the woman on the street - bagginess. Specifically on the derriere. Whilst the much younger can get away with the gangster stylee look, for the less nubile amongst us, something slightly more fitted is going to be a lot more flattering. I don't know about you, but having a backside which replicates that of a toddler needing a nappy change, isn't something for which I'd hand over hard earned cash.
- Length. My ideal length would be somewhere just below mid calf. And rolled up. Definitely rolled up. Too short and you're sporting pedal pushers. Too long and you descend into Mum jeans. Just add braces and hey presto, 80's TV presenter. I'm going to go for no.
Interestingly at the moment there aren't that many about. It does seem to be all about the skinny jean and whilst the High Street does have some options, it's all a bit Hobson's choice (acid wash anyone?)
Starting with the fashionista's favourite (and obviously the most expensive), the Current Elliot Panhandle Jeans from Matches. £285 (and gulp)
I love the wash but I'm thinking that perhaps slightly more tapered may be better? However they could be just baggy on the super slender model. Certainly I'd want to wear them every day till I had to have them surgically removed for that price.
From the sublime to the ridiculous. A bargainous pair from Gap. Now I have had reports that these aren't a great fit and certainly they'd be too short on a giraffe like me, 28 inch inside leg unrolled (reducing me to Huck Finn status. Not entirely the look I was going for) but they've got to be worth a try on if you like the wash, for £15.99.
The 1969 sexy Boyfriend Jeans flap pocket jeans.
Please can I point out that the use of the adjective "sexy" was not one I glibly threw in - that's what they're called. Not really selling it to the mum of 3 market, but hey ho. (maybe I should take the hint...)
They do have what I think is a preferable colour in their new range - would have to see in the flesh if it's worth the extra.
The 1969 sexy (barf) boyfriend jean at £49.95 (helpfully called practically the same thing)
An idea if you're not so keen on the slouch (technical term according to my research) is to wear them a size down for a slimmer fit.
Alternatively, there seems to be a slim fit boyfriend jean on the market. Clearly we're so attached to our skinny jeans, it appears it may be a good idea to wean us gently onto a baggier fit rather than go pure cold turkey.
Starting with a store I rarely visit now (although I have recommended their accessories to clients recently) - am still scarred by turning up to Balls in the 90's wearing the same cocktail dress as 10 other girls - Karen Millen. But I spied these through the door as I walked past last week and they looked like a really lovely wash - the perfect amount of distressing and a really great shape. Not too baggy, I'm sure most will consider them far more flattering than their looser counterparts. For me, probably too slim (in for a penny, in for a pound here) - am going to try them on tomorrow so will report back. With pics.....
The Blue Mid wash indigo denims (too cool even to call them jeans) - £85
Another slim fit boyfriend jean which is bound to be a great option, is from Topshop. They do of course have some more interesting variations which are strictly for those who don't remember them from first time round.
But the Lacey Vintage Slim Boy Fit Jeans look like a really good version for £42. I will see if they have them tomorrow.
A slightly more expensive number for £178 but a very good friend of mine totally raves about AG jeans. Cost per wear, if these are your ideal fit then I would say definitely worth the investment (I know I know I bang on about this all the time, but you do the maths). It's also worth noting that nearly all of the 33 reviewers give 5 out of 5 stars which is pretty telling.
The AG Simona from Anthropologie
Another reliable option would be the Vintage Straight jeans in Old Faithful from J.Crew. First free delivery option I am definitely ordering these (should my final option not pan out...)
And the final and currently top of the list, option is from Mango. I shamelessly nicked this idea from another lovely friend who had some fab slouchy jeans on the other day and indeed, they were from Mango. I'm not sure if these are the same ones but these do look great and I shall be seeing if they're in store tomorrow. (have to say am eyeing up the top as well....err and the bag and the shoes...)
Boyfriend style jeans from Mango - £32
And there we have it. For the moment. This is an ongoing obsession. I shall report back. And yes, I promise I shall include comedy pics so we can all have a good giggle. I can imagine some of them will be hilarious. (and not in a good way)
So are you going to be trying the Boyfriend jeans or are you still in the dear god no camp? Have I managed to convert you even slightly? What jeans are you planning on living in this SS?
So rounding up what I've been wearing the last couple of days. Starting with Saturday night, out for dinner with friends. An old faithful outfit.
Black Renoir cowl neck top - FCUK
Black skinny coated trousers - Cos
Black sequin jacket - Boutique by Jaeger
Gold statement necklace - All Saints
Gold cuff - Taylor Stephens
Black suede & patent boots - LK Bennett
Black clutch - Tory Burch
And here on Sunday for celebratory Mass as the 8 yr old is making her First Holy Communion this year. (apparently her outfit is more important than mine. Yeah right. She has visions of a Big Fat Gypsy wedding number. I fear she has her heart set on flashing lights. I'm attempting to disown). We also may have sloped off to McDonald's as some of us may have been a tad hungover. And the Big Tasty is back. If you haven't tried it, you must. If, however, you are not a McD's fan (and I am more than aware there are a lot of you out there) then I doubt this will turn you.
Bone and maroon breton top - Massimo Dutti
Raspberry Leigh jeans - Topshop
Tan and black quilted leather jacket - Massimo Dutti
Fabulous Finches scarf in owl brown - Mulberry
Wine wrist warmers - H&M
Sunglasses - H&M
Camel Cypress boots - Acne
Stone maxi zip satchel - Anya Hindmarch
Braving the freezing temperatures this week. No significant snow here. Yet. I am out for a rather large day out in London on Friday so you can guarantee that we'll have shed loads of the white stuff then. It's near my birthday. Always. And people wonder why I don't bother celebrating my birthday in January. Because I've been celebrating for 39 years and it pretty much is always ruined by the snow. Miserable rant over.
Oh and the rather revolting hat was added in desperation at the last min, dragged from the depths of the boot of the car as I thought my head might explode from cold on the school run.
Black longline l/s top - Baukjen
Wine jumper - Dorothy Perkins
Wine and blush knitted coatigan - Clements Ribeiro
Blush & fuchsia scarf - Virginia Johnson
Grey Baxter jeans - Topshop
Suede Bea wedge trainers - Ash
Crocheted black hat - Primark
Stone maxi zip satchel - Anya Hindmarch
Right, now can we please all pray that this works when I press Publish. Otherwise I shan't be held responsible for my actions. Love from the cretinous, technically bereft, moron.
I shall be back tomorrow xx